April 9, 2018

 

Dear Dad,

 

I’m writing to say Happy Birthday, and that I’m remembering you today. It’s not often that I email you from here, but today is a good day to do it. It was a hard day today for me because I saw a picture of you and it was one I didn’t have. It was kind of strange seeing you again at the age you left. Most of the time I see you as a younger man. I see you as a young father, with dishpan hands and a pack of Lucky Strikes in your pocket. I see you with a damp dishtowel over your shoulder as you shampoo my baby brother in the kitchen sink. It’s all encapsulated in a tunnel of time. At night, as I stand on my back porch and look at the stars, I remember watching the moon in the backyard with you adjusting your telescope toward the brightest constellation. You would talk about UFOs and how you always wanted to see one. But the closest you ever got was a meteorite, which you mistakenly cemented into the front step thinking it was an oddly shaped rock. I know you wanted to dig that thing out and use it as a doorstop instead. Someday someone will find it there when the house falls in and they build a new one in its place. I hope you feel your best and are happy there. I hope you see all your dreams come true. I wish you had spent a little more time because I was just getting to know you as an adult. I am so upset that I put off visiting you and taking time to be with you before you left. I thought we had more time. Well, you never know, do you? Anyway, save a place for me at the table. I’ll be with you in a while. We can really catch up. Happy birthday, Daddy.

 

© April 9, 2018

By Diane E. Dockum